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What to Do When Your Partner Leaves You

When a relationship ends abruptly, it can feel like the rug has been pulled out from under you. The emotional fallout from abandonment can be intense, as you lose your main source of emotional support and companionship. As a therapist in Los Angeles, I often see clients grappling with the aftermath of such losses, and one of the most important steps in the healing process is seeking support from others. Here are some tips to guide you through the recovery process:

Young couple on the beach in the middle of a breakup involving relationship abandonment

1 | Find New Sources of Support


The first thing to remember is that you don't have to go through this alone. Support can come in many forms, such as friends and family, a companion animal, a support group, or seeing a therapist. Each of these avenues offers a different type of solace and understanding, helping to fill the void left by the lost relationship.


It's common to want to isolate yourself after experiencing abandonment. Feelings of shame, grief, or a desire to avoid discussing the painful event can drive you to retreat from social interactions. However, this isolation can exacerbate those negative feelings, making the healing process even harder. Reaching out and connecting with others, even when it feels difficult, is a crucial step toward recovery.


2 | Address Depression and Suicidal Thoughts


If you struggle with depression or thoughts of suicide, seeking help becomes even more critical. The end of a relationship is one of the main risk factors for suicide, and it's essential to recognize when you need professional support. Speaking to others about your experience, especially those who have gone through something similar, can significantly reduce feelings of shame and help you feel more supported. The last thing you need during this challenging time is to feel alone in your recovery.


3 | Rediscover Your Sense of Self


A vital component of abandonment recovery is to rediscover your sense of self. Start by asking yourself what you want and need throughout the day. This self-inquiry can guide you in nurturing your emotional well-being.


You may notice days when you need to take it slow and allow yourself space to feel big emotions. Embrace these moments and give yourself permission to grieve. There will also be days when you have the energy to engage in activities that bring you joy. On these days, immerse yourself in what you love, whether it's a hobby, spending time with friends, or simply enjoying a peaceful walk in nature.


4 | Balance Emotions and Gratitude


Seek a balance between processing your unpleasant emotions and finding gratitude for the good things in your life. A holistic approach to healing involves acknowledging and feeling your pain while also recognizing and appreciating the positive aspects of your life. This balance can help you rebuild your sense of self and move forward with a renewed perspective.


Final Thoughts


Healing from relationship abandonment is a journey that requires time, patience, and support. By seeking help from others, addressing any underlying mental health concerns, and rediscovering your sense of self, you can navigate this challenging period and emerge stronger. Remember, you are not alone, and there are resources available to support you through this process.


Crisis Support


If you need help right away, please utilize the following crisis resources.

Disclaimer


This post is meant for educational purposes only and isn’t a substitute for diagnosis, assessment or treatment of mental conditions. If you need professional help, seek it out.

 

About the author


Hi! I'm Natalie. And my passion is helping ambitious, creative millennials achieve everything they want in life, career and relationships. I provide in-person therapy in Pasadena and online therapy throughout California. Click here to get started.

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